Do I need to get married, now?

According to hadits HR. Tirmizi, An Nasai and Ibnu Majah, I summarized (CMIIW), one of those who Allah will grant their wishes to be married is one of those who needs to be married.

I am 27, old enough to get married and I want to be married.

The question is, do I need it?

I am female, 27 years old, who live in Jakarta, work for a developing company, with well I can say, nice monthly payment. I can feed myself and treat myself to travel abroad (so far, around Asia only) once or twice a year. I have my own car and my company grants me a housing loan. I am not rich but insyaALLAH, financially secured. Do I want a husband to feed me? I do. Do I need a husband to feed me? Nah…

I am female, working as geologist. I work with fellow geologists, geophysicists and engineers. Most of them are males. Some of them are my good friends. Friends I hang out with -watching movies, going karaoke or traveling, or others- and friends who I can ask for help and who will help me when I need a favor. I feel secured around them. And I also feel secured by myself. I run my errands, take my car to the service station every five thousands kilometer, go to the clinic when I get sick, do this and do that by myself. I’m fine with that and I’m proud of myself for that. I don’t need husband, only to make me feel secured.

I now live with my sister. She also works in Jakarta. There was time when I felt empty every time I went home, because there was no family welcoming me home and no one asking how my day was going. But now I have her. Before, I like had thousand things to do before going home, now I just want to go home as soon as I can, to meet her, to ask her how her day was going. We talk, we smile, we laugh and sometimes we argue. I’m happy living together with her. So, I don’t need a hubby to do this either.

Of course I want to get married. Of course I want to have my own family. Of course I want to live in a house surrounded by smiles and laughs from my hubby, my kids, and me. But I guess, now, I just don’t need it yet.

Well, I don't know when I will need to be married. Maybe, when I need to share everything of me with someone else and to accept every difference we may have. To change “I” to “we”, “mine” to “our”. I guess from his assessment, Allah thinks now I’m still too selfish to have that.

my twenty seven

This is September, my month of birthday. I blew candles and had some lunches and dinners with family and friends. I’m surrounded by happiness.

Thank you all for the wishes, for the cake, for the present and for having great time with me on my birthday and birth month :p

Thank you, Papa, for taking us to a fancy dinner. It was a super great night that I will always remember. When we were at home in Balikpapan, Papa barely took us out for a dinner, but that night was different. Not only we went out for it, but also we went to a quite fancy restaurant and had seafood for our dinner. There was no gulai cancang or gulai limpa or rendang involved :p

Thank you, you, even though you did it awkwardly and hesitantly, beside my family, you were mmm kinda the first person who greeted happy birthday to me in the early morning. And also thanks for the singing ;)

Thank you, RAB, for your email. The fact that you still remember it, flattered me. Above all ups and downs we’ve been through, I’m glad we’re still friends.

I was like hoping nothing for this twenty seven, but you guys really gave me a blast birthday.

THANK YOU!